The Precious Holy Spirit
It’s been an awesome five months since my sovereign meeting with Abba for massive emotional healing. A glorious five month journey of incredible intensity and beauty beyond my ability to describe. How I have delighted in saturating myself in His gentle love – after all, I don’t remember ever being told anyone loved me – ever. But Abba and my beautiful Bridegroom never grew tired of telling me of their love and wrapping me in their arms. And they were passionate in their expressions.
Now I am gradually taking my place back into activities of the Kingdom. But I will never be the same, again. There is a depth of intercession and decreeing that wasn’t there previously. I have a trust that is childlike but powerful in its simplicity. I knew I had God’s authority before, but now I walk in the Holy Spirit’s fiery passion. His fire dances over my head as I walk into dark places with His covering. Sometimes I ask to see what He is doing through my prayers, and He allows me a glimpse. Most of the time I am satisfied to just press against Him, though, and receive His kisses and overpowering bursts of enthusiasm.
In the former life of only six months ago, I had to always be on the go; sewing a quilt, baking chicken breasts, driving to visit a friend or family member. Now I spend several hours a day just enjoying His sweet Presence. Sometimes I wonder what life might have been like if I could have experienced this life-altering healing of griefs and sorrows years ago. But, no matter; this soul-satisfying Love fills and spills over to meet my deepest longings. I hunger for Love. He is Love… O my goodness!
My relationships with Abba and my Bridegroom are intimate, but possibly the biggest surprise is how I am getting to know the Holy Spirit. When He drove out the two demons that came to molest me, I saw Him as taller than the trees standing at the roadside and brighter than the sun. He looked like the sunshine glinting off a metal roof – too bright to look at. And He was Fierce! The power of His Presence was untamed ferociousness. All three of the Godhead were concerned for my welfare and defense. I can still see Them standing around me silently, waiting for me to speak to Them. Their concern was so respectful and pure and compassionate. What a precious, priceless treasure each of Them is.
What God said to Jeremiah is true for each one of us: Jer. 1:5 Before I formed you in the womb I knew you…
This week two more alters have surfaced. One was an infant possibly 3 months old. She was pink and healthy and watched me with trusting eyes. Abba said she was trusting because I had nurtured her. The other alter was a strong personality about 12 to 14 years old and I recognized her for her acting out. Nevertheless, I remembered the things said to her by our parents, and things not said that should have been, such as, I love you. So I had a long talk with her and explained that her desperate search for love was reasonable but that only Jesus could satisfy her starving, emaciated spirit. She promptly sought out Jesus. We found that our spirits agreed with our hungers and how we were discovering deep needs met in Abba and His only Son. My nights are quieter now that she has integrated with me. I’m looking forward to having her strength of character joined with mine.