I believe my multiple personalities have integrated with me; I sense no more separate entities. The inner meadow and tree house have faded away and I meet the Triune God face-to-face both in my body and out of body. Out of the body experiences are not common yet, but I expect to meet Jesus that way increasingly frequently.
There has been a renewed focus on intercession which is my primary spiritual purpose and has been since I was a teenager. As you read my autobiography you can recognize the character traits of an intercessor. As I spend time at the foot of the Father’s throne with Jesus and the Holy Spirit on either side of me, I am aware of much greater strength and stability within. For example, I used to cry until I didn’t feel well when praying so intensely, but now I can pray intensely with few tears. Having few tears enables me to pray more perseveringly. The communion with all of the God-head is deeply satisfying. I can hear when Jesus or Abba speaks to me and I understand more quickly. I also can distinguish Who speaks to me because each personality of the God-head has a different way of communicating with me.
Since the major integration, in the past couple of weeks, I have been aware of unusual demonic resistance to the point that I’ve begun to search for an open door to him in my life. As I’ve thought back over the circumstances of early trauma, I realize that my mother was far more destructive than she should have been. I am the main genealogist for our family nationally, so I know our ancestry well. But I lacked an obituary for her grandfather, so I got in touch with the Genealogy Society of the county in which her grandfather was born and obtained an obit. Why was I not surprised to learn from the obit that he belonged to two Masonic Lodges, one of which accepted women?
When Mom’s grandfather’s first wife died he married a much younger woman who could not get along with his children. The male ancestors were hard-working and had amassed a significant fortune, so Mom’s grandfather gave each of his children a cash settlement and the remainder of his estate was left to public utilities in his county – the railroad, the hospital, etc. Mom’s father was Grandfather’s only son, and he was given $300 although the estate was in the tens of thousands of dollars. (A hundred years ago that was a sizeable amount of money.) Masonry curses follow the first born, so I was the primary focus of the horrible curses to which I fell heir. As I prayed the prayers recommended, it was like a large dust cloud of demons that left me. No wonder I had such a rough beginning and dealt with so many traumas such as the spirit of death!
The one thing I have always longed for and continue to press Abba for is Love. I Want His Love. I Need His Love! Now that I have better access to Him I have not let up seeking Him daily and many times throughout the day. If not now, when?!
I had fainted if I had not believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living, Ps. 27:13.
Below is a link to the website where you can download prayers for various aspects of Multiple Personality Disorder, generational curses, Masonry curses, as well as prayers to restore one’s birthright. Go through the prayers with someone who has discernment and can help you. If you have no one to help you, then by all means pray the prayers alone. You can get free.
Emotional healing is a process in the sense that it is actually the living out of holiness, for “without holiness no man shall see the Lord,” Hebrews 12:14. It is a life-long journey because we are new creatures in Christ Jesus as His little children. But “I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of the Lord than to dwell in the tents of the wicked,” Psalm 84:10. This journey is not for the faint of heart but the rewards in the here-and-now are soul-satisfying and there is more to look forward to in the next world.