God never does anything half way. Jesus provided healing of sicknesses and diseases, and also griefs and sorrows through His terrible suffering at Pilate’s Court and on Golgotha. He provided everything we need, but the journey may be a complex one.
Holy Spirit as Facilitator
While counselors tell people with DID (Dissociative identity Disorder) they need a facilitator, you can definitely be healed by informing yourself of the situation and follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Few people have the motivation and commitment to stay the course, however. A trusted, godly friend who can affirm you as you progress would be a blessing, and I had such a friend. For her I am thankful.
The Holy Spirit was my Facilitator. He started me on the path to healing by coming to me one night as I called out to Him to come and love me. God my Father came and I ran to meet Him eagerly. He gave me a full frontal hug that lingered and I melted into Him. He felt so good. As a believer I knew God was Love and that I was created to receive His Love, but in all my life I had never experienced this depth of poured out Love. And I didn’t ever want to be separated from Him after this one taste. If you go back into the archives of my journey, you can read in more detail how He came to me night after night and gently lead me. To know Him is to want more of Him!
Your motivation and perseverance are critical to your healing. If you enjoy the attention your condition gets, you will never experience healing. Why do you want to be healed?
Another critical issue is your relationship with the Creator of all things. You cannot experience freedom from spiritual bondage without a committed relationship with the Savior. This is especially true of those who have suffered ritual abuse.
There are few trained Christian counselors who understand God’s principles adequately to guide a trauma survivor to wholeness. Relying on someone to “fix” you will result in disappointment, for only God knows you from the inside out. You will need to inform yourself to understand what DID is and how to approach a healing strategy. This is probably one of the most important keys to integration and wholeness.
Denial keeps Dissociation in place
Most counselors focus on memories and alternate personalities found within the DID survivor’s “system”. However, think about this: denial is a natural outcome of dissociation. Denial is what keeps dissociation in place. There could be no conflict if there were no violation of the victim’s beliefs and/or expectations. For example, trauma and personality-splits occur when a parent repeatedly fails to protect an infant. The infant needs parental protection and is traumatized when his/her expectation is not met. The victim must come to realize that her mother did indeed beat her unmercifully every time she cried for food or to be changed or to be held and cuddled. When the survivor faces up to what happened, healing can begin in earnest. When denial is resolved, dissociation is no longer needed.
Changing Perspective – Identity Crisis
Changing my perspective involved acknowledging and correcting false beliefs, especially about my identity. Having an intimate relationship with Jesus and Abba, I talked with them as I would trusted friends and they gave me Scriptures to confess about myself. At first, making Scriptural confessions was difficult because I struggled to believe what they said about me. But God’s Love flowed and overflowed me almost constantly.
Changing perspective means coming face-to-face with emotions that the precious Holy Spirit so gently counters with compassion and mercy. Getting acquainted with Him is still on-going, but I look back and smile with delight at His long-suffering and dry wit. I believed so strongly in Isaiah 53:4-5 that I was persistent in seeking wholeness. Matthew 11:12 says the violent take the Kingdom by force and I was violent in pressing for what I knew was mine.
The triune God was so caring and loving, but we also had times of laughter because they knew my very heart. What a joy they are. When I had a (bad) day of focusing on myself, I would offer the sacrifice of joy, and sing to them. My singing drew them to stand in front of me, listening with pleasure. Then they drew me in and I was refreshed once more by their intensely passionate Love.
Ask yourself, “What would it mean if these memories were true?” An honest answer will dissolve the conflict when beliefs merge with truth. This brings healing to one’s memories and facilitates the merging of alters with the core person. If it were true that my mother hated me as soon as she knew she was pregnant, and she neglected me in favor of housework and laundry, beat me when I cried, etc. – if all that were true, yet Abba was there, never leaving my side even for one moment. He knew to whom He was sending me.
When the core person’s perspective changes, that effects the alters who receive healing concurrently. Their separate existence is no longer needed. The survivor is able to own all her history and all her parts.
I had little attachment to my mother but owning the truth that she was abusive was still difficult. My father was a violent man with a temper that bordered on temporary insanity. Nevertheless, both my parents were well-known and respected in our community, so telling any of my early life memories has been difficult and is usually met with resistance. It would be so much easier to simply remain silent, but I have felt that finalizing healing includes telling of my early experiences. Two of my friends, both mothers with adult children, have backed away from me. I suspect that what I have said has caused them to look at their own lives more closely and made them extremely uncomfortable. Denial at work.
You can’t be healed of what you don’t have
Denial is a wily thing. Actually, denial protects the wounds (hinders healing). You can’t be healed of what you don’t have! It can show up at unexpected junctions and the survivor must truly want transparency. I’ve mentioned in my archives how the Holy Spirit urged me to disrobe, i.e. become transparent before Abba and my Bridegroom. Not easy! But absolutely necessary. They already knew me better than I knew myself, but I needed to take this step toward truth. Their response to my choice of having no barriers was compassion and Love. That was a major step in my healing process!
If you believe that emotional healing is not possible, your God is too small. The One who made the universe, the earth, the nations – He can surely cleanse our wounds, take our pain, and restore to us wholeness and the joy of knowing Him.
Most of the material for this post came from http://www.rcm-usa.org They are a professional Christian ministry and have many articles and newsletters available for download free on their site.